Before you take any action toward confronting a conference call leader employing the hot potato strategy, you must make an important determination. Failing to properly make this determination is a fast way to limit your career path within the organization. Think of this like crossing the street, look BOTH ways before you take the first step!
Leaders either intentionally or unintentionally employ this strategy. You can directly or indirectly confront conference call leaders. In this post, we’ll focus on the leader who intentionally employs this strategy.
Leaders who intentionally employ the hot potato strategy communicate something important – they think control and intimidation are useful strategies when dealing with people.
There is no upside in directly confronting this type of leader – you will only become a target in the current conference call as well as all future interactions. You have to employ an indirect process for dealing with this person and let go of any intention to “help them” or “change their behavior”(come to think of it, completely letting go of trying to help others or change their behavior in all parts of your life is a direct route to happiness and peace!) This leader is fear-based and will continue to use this strategy until something or someone more powerful compels them to change (i.e. a superior makes it clear that this type of behavior is not acceptable).
One tried and true strategy that lets you avoid any type of confrontation is to give a two or three sentence response that makes it sound like you are paying attention yet your comment is absolutely meaningless. You state something generic about the topic without taking a firm position. You appear engaged yet no one will ask you to defend your thoughts. This takes practice and can have a steep learning curve! Although commonly used (start listening for it), this is not an approach I’d recommend.
Another option is to indirectly confront the leader. When randomly called upon for no apparent reason, respond by asking a simple question. You now have time to mentally get back into the call by putting the “hot potato” back into the hands of the leader. Come up with a question that feels comfortable for you to ask. Examples could include: “Could you please repeat the question?” or “I was not able to follow your thinking – could you please reframe what you just said?” Be as truthful and honest here as possible. Your question must be congruent with the discussion that just took place.
Your third option is to say that you have nothing to add to the discussion at this time. Make this statement in your most calm and serene voice and end on a verbal down stroke. (Not sure what verbal down stroke means? Ask me to explain.) Of the three options, this is the one where the leader will most likely come back at you and ask “why?” Be prepared to explain. Of the three options, this is the hardest one to pull off without a hitch.
One word of caution! DO NOT “throw” the hot potato to an unsuspecting peer. Always send it back to the leader.
Leaders who intentionally play hot potato are playing games. The more experienced the leader is at playing the game, the more dangerous and devious they will become. Do not engage in their game nor think you can “help” them to improve. You can’t! Remain focused on getting your job done and steer clear of this individual. Carefully watch them and strive to not provoke them. Console yourself with the thought that it will one day catch up them!
In my next post, we’ll discuss how to directly confront leaders who unintentionally use this strategy.
Posted by Byron Van Arsdale
Creator of Executive Conference Call Leadership
ConferenceCallTraining.com
